I'm a glutton for punishment

(Note: all interviews went well - I'm waiting to hear back if I get second interviews now. I have an interview to be a substitute teacher on Tuesday. I'll update you when there is news!!)

My friend Danielle loaned me a book called Beautiful Boy. Many of you are nodding in recognition, because apparently I am the ONLY human on the face of the earth who hadn't heard of it. I stayed up nights reading this thing. I read it in absolute horror, but like a nasty car accident where you just have to stay in the lane so you can see the dead body in the street, no matter how much you don't really wanna. Ya know what I mean? This book was AWFUL. It was beautifully written. The characters were compelling and believable. The storyline was amazing. So what, pray tell, made it awful? It was about a perfectly normal family who loved their wonderful, brilliant, well-adjusted son, gave him every possible advantage, and he became a meth addict anyway.

WHAAAAT? I'm sorry, I think I misunderstood. Perfectly normal, healthy, brilliant, talented, well-adjusted children do NOT become meth addicts. Sorry, it's just not true.

Meth addict children happen to people who beat their kids, or neglect them, do meth WITH them or leave them alone and unsupervised for days on end while they go sell heroin or something, right? They don't happen to Mr. and Mrs. Normal America (like me), right?

The worst part about this book is that it is a true story.

sigh

So, just because I wasn't tortured enough about the possibility of my sweet, innocent, darling son or daughter becoming a meth addict during THIS book, I am now reading a book written by the son telling the story from his point of view.

I must be insane. (Remember the illustration about the car wreck? Craning my neck to see? Yep, that's me.)

Interviews

I have two job interviews tomorrow and one on Thursday! Hang on a sec... (dancing a little jig) ok, I'm back. One of the interviews is at Borders bookstore. I'm kinda excited about that one because, I mean, who doesn't want to work at a bookstore?? As you, my 4 loyal readers know, I am a reader, man. I loooooove to read. When I was a kid, I would read the back of the cereal box at breakfast. I'll read anything. But, with anything, there are pluses and minuses of working at Borders.

PLUS: Very flexible hours

MINUS: Very sad pay

PLUS: They loan their employees books, so I can read brand new bestsellers without buying them!!

MINUS: It's retail - hours on my feet and did I mention the very sad pay??

PLUS: I am always recommending books to people at Borders anyway, they may as well pay me for it!

MINUS: Did I mention the very sad pay??

So, the question is, do the pluses outweigh the minuses? I dunno. We'll have to see when I have my interview!

I also have an interview at a Spa (oooh, ahhh). If they give employee discounts, I'm probably in trouble... "You want to pay me in free facials, manicures, pedicures and massages? OK!" It's a very high-end spa, so that might be fun. I'd probably meet some celebs, which is ALWAYS fun...but I know nothing about the hours or the pay.

My third interview is at Wells Fargo to be a teller. 30 hours a week. That might be interesting, and the pay will probably be good. I dunno if I'm cut out to be a teller...but ya never know.

I am also applying to be a substitute teacher at the public schools around here. I figure with 80 gazillion schools, they could probably keep me working all day every day if I wanna. AND I won't have to work holidays, AND I'll be off Spring Break, AND if I need a day off, I just refuse a job. Seems like a good plan to me. I think it might be combat pay, especially in the High Schools, but I suspect it will be interesting.

So, my options are wide open and it looks like I can be whatever I want when I grow up. It's exciting to have opportunities, and it will be fun having these interviews over the next couple of days. Stay tuned, sportsfans!!

Value Statement

Here in the STQ family, we have a problem (at least for me). The boys (2, or 3 if you count the dog) outnumber the girls (1). Since Megan is off at college, it leaves me all by my lonesome with these crazy, wrestling-loving boys. Don't get me wrong - I love the time Chase and divine hubby spend together throwing each other around, and they love it too. It is wonderful bonding time and I really do appreciate the testosterone that is exuded while the wrestling is going on.

What I hate is the arguing. The bickering. The constant complaining to and about each other. Did I say I hate it? Well, I absolutely do. Of course, they love it. Drives me nuts.

So, last night I came up with a plan. I have told the darling men in my life that for dinner tonight I want each of us to tell the others the one thing that is most important to them about our family. No, I don't mean the pool...I mean one characteristic that they either already love or wish there was more of in our family. Then, we're going to talk about ways to achieve that for each of us.

I know I'm outnumbered. I know males love the art of the fight. I do not want to take that away and only have frilly little tea parties here in the STQ family. I am not trying to emasculate my divine hubby or Chase. I just think there can be some lines drawn and some attitude adjustments made in order to give another member of the family what (ahem) she wants too.

I also think there is some value in talking about what's important to each of us as individuals. I may be very surprised what divine hubby and Chase come up with. I don't think they will be surprised at what I come up with, but I think there are ways to give us all what we need. I'm going to create a value statement for the STQ family!

Friendship

One thing our constant relocations have taught me is the value of friendship. When we lived in Austin, honestly, I took friends for granted. They were everywhere! We knew almost everyone at church, we never sat in a pew alone, at school, Chase had good friends as well as acquaintances to hang out with on the weekends, and we just were blessed with good people around us.

When you move, you don't have that luxury. Everyone is a new friend. No one here knows that I have bug dreams (or what they are even if I tell them), and certainly no one has experienced them with me at a conference somewhere! No one here knows that we are Packer fans, or why. No one here knows that I used to watch the snow plows with fascination from my living room window or that I am chronically early for everything. Every story, every personality quirk, every preference is new and requires explanation. Not necessarily a bad thing, but kind of a lonely thing.

I am certainly not discounting the long-distance relationships I have maintained. In Austin, in Green Bay, in Denver, I have wonderful friends who love me and have continued to live my life with me, even after I have constantly relocated again. And I know that in a year, I will have wonderful friends here about whom I can say the same. I just don't right now. I have made friends with a woman from karate, who has loaned me her two boys for the afternoon today. Her name is Danielle, and we have a lot in common. I enjoy her company a lot, and we have even started trading books, as we are both readers. So, my whining will eventually come to an end, I know, when more time has passed and more friends have been made.

It's just funny that before I became a gypsy, I would have said I only had a few close friends, and not a big group of them. As I think of it, the word friend has many meanings. Some friends, I only saw at book club or sat next to at church sometimes. Some friends, I only saw a couple of times a year for a birthday celebration or an occasional lunch. Some friends I saw nearly every day when our kids played "Annie I Over" in the neighborhood or to have dinner together. All of my friends have made an impact on my life and I cherish those memories. I truly hope we live here long enough to have those kinds of friendships again.

Plain Truth

As many of you know, I am a voracious reader. I love all things literary, but mostly, I love fiction. Good, page-turning fiction. Truth be told, I'm more into the NY Times Bestsellers than the classics, but I do love me some Steinbeck when I'm in the mood...

I have recently read several books by Jodi Picoult. Who? Some of you are asking, but I think you'll recognize her more easily when the movie adaptation of her book My Sister's Keeper comes out soon. She writes books about terrible subjects. Like kidnapping, molestation, infantacide, school shootings, etc. But, the great thing about her books is that she writes chapters from each of the characters' points of view. So, although we all condemn a Columbine-esque type of school shooting, when you get to the chapter written from the teenaged shooter's point of view, you find out that he's not necessarily a demon - troubled, certainly, but not inherently evil.

I guess, before reading her book 19 Minutes, which is about that very subject, I kind of thought Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris were always monsters. Probably killed small animals and tortured their uncaring parents on the weekends, you know the type. But, in all likelihood, they were normal kids for the first part of their lives. I think that's what scares us so about these crimes. It scares me - you expect monsters to look like monsters. Not like my kid, or the kid down the street.

I just read her book Plain Truth about an Amish teenager who secretly has a baby out of wedlock and it turns up dead in the family's barn before anyone knew about its existence. And about a murder trial, and how difficult that is for an Amish family to handle. About simplicity. About black and white. About love and loss. About judgment, ignorance and understanding.

I love to read a book that teaches me something. I love books that you finish with a little bit more understanding of something you either were ignorant of in the first place, or you had an incorrect opinion of. If only my physics teacher could have spun me a tale of murder and intrigue or love or terror to teach me about vectors, we would have all been better off!

Summer is officially over

Chase heads to his new school today. Last night we were talking before bed, and he said he was a little bit nervous, but then he said (putting a sympathetic hand on my shoulder), "Mommy, I'm going to be fine. Remember Green Bay and Denver? I was just fine there, and this is going to be fine too. I promise. You don't have to worry about me." sniff sniff

What a great kiddo I have. He has absolutely rolled with every punch, and we've had a few punches in the past four years. He's right - he will be just fine. We have worked hard to make sure his school is safe and challenging, and I know his very best friend in the world is waiting for him in the 5th grade classroom.

So, now it's my turn. I gotta get myself gainfully employed! I've applied for several jobs I found online, but I really think that may not do it. The unemployment rate is high here, and the kinds of jobs I'm applying for are likely to draw a lot of interest (part-time, school-year only). I think I'm going to have to hit the road, Jack.

On the bright side - the Packers/Broncos game is being broadcast live this weekend! We're hoping for the best from our first post-Favre season.

Old Friends

I chatted (electronically, of course) with a good friend this morning. Made me remember all of the things we used to do together and all of the fun we had. She started the world's most successful playgroup, and Chase and I were charter members. At our church, we were known to be joined at the hip. We would chat on the phone for hours, and our very favorite phrase of all was, "You know it's all about me. Unless it's about you." It was always all about ONE of us, that is for sure. And we went through A LOT together.

Our boys were the very best of friends, or at least as good a friends as one can be when one is 3. They played together, fought together, made up together, got mullet haircuts together (ok, no, mine had the bowl cut, but hers had a mullet, for sure!!), and nearly lived together for several years.

Then, life happened. She moved about an hour out of town and began to homeschool her boys. Homeschooling takes a lot of time, and her life was no longer her own. And I worked part time while Chase was in school and with soccer, church, etc, driving an hour out of town on a regular basis was out of the question. But, we still talked on the phone often, and met to go to the Women of Faith conference and to celebrate our birthdays.

Then, I became a gypsy and began my constant relocation. Now, I am lucky to see her once a year when I visit Texas. We talk on the phone only occasionally. She is no longer my constant companion, but it doesn't take much to make me think of her.

Old friends weave themselves into our lives and become part of us in a permanent way. There are so many times I find myself thinking of her or hearing something that reminds me of her. Even when we haven't seen each other in months and months, if we chat on the phone, we are both in hysterics and could talk forever. I cherish my memories of her, and of so many of the friends I have left behind in my wanderings. I'm feeling nostalgic today, can you tell??